I’m kind of at a juncture in my life right now, and it’s got me evaluating a few things.

  • During my formative years, I was a member of an evangelical church. Not everything was perfect, but on the whole it was good to me and for me, and I was baptized there. No matter where I go, I do not think I will be able to shake some of the conditioning that comes with being raised in a certain church or tradition.
  • At one time, I thought the Reformed worldview answered all of life’s questions, but now I feel like it reduces salvation down to a matter of math. I have a hard time not viewing it through some of the caricatures from which I used to adamantly defend it. I realize that Calvinism is logical, structured, systematic and proof-texted — I just don’t believe it anymore. 
  • But I still love the churches I attended when I was at that juncture in my life, and they, too, were not only good for me but in a couple of instances probably saved my life. I will also likely carry the zeal for hard truth I picked up while a Calvinist.
  • I can’t believe I ever took theonomy as seriously as I did.
  • I don’t believe embracing mystery and legitimate mysticism are excuses to stop pursuing knowledge, and neither is submitting to a hierarchical ecclesiology.
  • Every day for the last six months I have prayed God will preserve me from error, no matter where I go.

This is by no means an exhaustive list.

Advertisements